Jokes and amusing tales

Three retired and rather ancient Met detectives, by a pure stroke of coincidence, found themselves outside the pearly gate entrance to Heaven at the same time. As they waited on St Peter, they got into an argument about which of the Departments they’d served on was “The Best”.

Soon, St Peter appeared, opened the gate and, having been good and honest servants of the crown, all three detectives were allowed entry. They decided to settle their argument, figuring that only St Peter could be the ultimate source of truth and honesty. So, the three former detectives asked him, “Saint Peter, which Department at Scotland Yard is the best? Is it the Fraud Squad, which has been suggested to be the most prestigious, or is it the Anti-Terrorist Squad, the folks that are so key to security these days? Or, is it the Arts and Antiques squad, as one of us claims, a team so specialised and knowledgeable that they provide a unique service?”

Saint Peter replied, “I can’t answer that. However, I will ask God what He thinks the next time I see Him. Meanwhile, thank you for your service on Earth and welcome to Heaven.”

Sometime later the three former detectives see Saint Peter and remind him of the question they had asked when first entering Heaven and they asked Saint Peter if he was able to ask God for the answer to their answer.

Suddenly, a sparkling white dove lands on Saint Peter’s shoulder. In the dove’s beak is a note glistening with gold dust. Saint Peter opens the note, trumpets blare, gold dust drifts into the air, harps play crescendos and Saint Peter begins to read the note aloud to the three detectives:

TO: All Former Detectives.
SUBJECT: Which Department Is the Best

1. All branches of the Police Service are honourable and noble.

2. Each serves the United Kingdom well and with distinction.

3. Serving in the police service represents a great honour warranting special respect,  and appreciation from your fellow man.

4. Always be proud of that.

Warm regards,

Detective Inspector, SO8, Flying Squad (Retired)


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